Calling 911 usually means something serious has happened. Perhaps someone got hurt. Perhaps there’s an armed robbery. Perhaps a fire broke out. But what if someone called 911 for something banal? Something that one would not traditionally consider an emergency? Well, unfortunately, it happens, and it happens more often than you think. Panic, excessive alcohol consumption, and simple ignorance are among the most common causes of crazy or downright unhinged 911 calls. But among all of these, there are 8 that stand out – 8 calls that are so silly, so crazy, and so inexplicable that you won’t believe your eyes. Are you intrigued? Well, if so, then keep reading!
SQUIRREL IN A TOILET
Haven’t we all at least once found a squirrel casually soaking in our toilet? No? Well, one Oklahoma woman has, and what did she do in this peculiar predicament? Obviously, she decided to call 911. Fortunately, the authorities arrived quickly and apprehended (or rescued) the pesky rodent.
WHO’S WHO?
Imagine you’re taking a shower and suddenly you hear someone you don’t know enter the house. What’s more, that someone has a gun. You’d call 911 as soon as possible. I mean, who wouldn’t? What if I told you that this exact scenario has occurred… but the person taking the shower was the burglar and the “intruder” was actually the owner of the house?
In 2011, Timothy James Chapek, an Oregon-based petty criminal, decided to break into a house. During his pursuits, however, he decided to take a shower. Makes sense, right? Then, the owner of the house suddenly barged into the house. The audacity! To top that off, he (allegedly) had a gun. Timothy, scared for his life, locked himself inside the bathroom and called 911. What did the owner of the house do? He… also called 911. When the police came, they arrested the burglar and put an end to this madness.
MEAN VENDING MACHINE
Credit card theft is no joke, especially if the crime is committed by a man wearing a Pepsi costume. One 911 operator recalls a call he received late in the night from an individual who was greatly distressed by what he described as a “man in a giant Pepsi suit” who allegedly had stolen the caller’s credit card. The concerned but somewhat perplexed operator sent officers to the “scene of the crime,” only to discover a man high on marijuana engaged in a heated discussion with an imposing vending machine. Thankfully, no one got hurt in the process, not even the elusive Pepsi man.
A CRIMINAL SNORE
To be honest, snoring should (kinda) be considered an offense of some sort, haha. I mean, there are so many weird laws out there already. Haven’t you ever had a sleepless night because your partner or a family member was mercilessly snoring for hours on end? Well, one 911 caller had enough of this pesky annoyance and decided to… call the authorities on the nefarious snorer. As the call goes:
Caller: “She’s just snoring away like a train”
911 Operator: “Is that her snoring that I’m hearing?”
Caller: “Yeah. She’s snoring like a train”
Like a train, he says.
A CHICKEN BLOCKADE
Imagine you work pizza delivery, and you’re trying to get to your destination as soon as possible. If you take too long, you might get a reduced tip. Then, as you’re driving down the street, suddenly, a rouge chicken appears and blocks your path.
That’s exactly what happened to one pizza delivery guy from Ohio. And how did he handle this rather distressing situation? He called 911. The operator was trying to understand what had happened but all they could hear was the pizza delivery guy desperately pleading with the uncompromising animal to move out of the way. Reportedly, the chicken ultimately did cross the road, and all was merry!
LEGOS ARE NO JOKE
Brotherly disputes are nothing new. And, heck, some can get violent and require police intervention. But, um, the one I’m about to share with you doesn’t quite hit the mark.
A kid decided to call 911 because… his older brother wouldn’t share Legos with him. What’s more, the selfish brother also claimed that he had all the Legos that ever existed (that was impossible!). The little brother got very upset and wanted the cops to come and arrest his older brother, the Lego thief. They… never came.
WI-FI SQUABBLE
Nowadays, we are so used to being connected to the Internet at all times that whenever something goes awry, and our connection is lost, we panic.
That’s exactly what this parent did. After they found out that their own child had changed the Wi-Fi password, the parent confidently called 911, asking for police assistance. The kid was… 9 years old.
I mean, to some degree, it’s understandable. To have your own flesh and blood betray you in such a brazen way must be crushing. But still, maybe calling 911 is taking it a bit too far.
A STRAY ROCK
Many things can cause distress – death of a loved one, serious illness, or financial problems. In this case, a 911 caller was distressed by… a stray rock in his garden, which prevented him from mowing his lawn.
Apparently, the rock hadn’t been there before. It was also quite large, so someone must have put it there on purpose. The caller pleaded with the dispatcher to do something about this “goddamn rock.”
How did the stray rock end up in this poor man’s garden? Was the rock apprehended? Was the caller finally able to mow his lawn in peace? Unfortunately, we’ll never know the answers to these questions.